Best Steve Spurrier Quotes: How 2014 Offseason Was Won

Steve Spurrier should have a camera and microphone following him around 24/7, because nearly every time he opens his mouth, it’s worth recording and playing back a dozen times.

Over the span of his career, Spurrier has spouted off tons of memorable quotes, but this offseason in particular has been a doozy for the Ol’ Ball Coach.

Here are the best Spurrierisms from the last few months to get you pumped for the season that’s just a couple weeks away…

The G.O.A.T.

He owns SEC Media Days. Once again, NO ONE had a more enjoyable presser than Spurrier.

Weak Sauce

On Texas A&M scheduling:

“I find it interesting that they quit playing Texas. They played Texas 115 years like we have played Clemson and then they left that Big 12 conference and both schools got mad at each other and said, ‘We aren’t going to play you anymore.’ It would be like us and Clemson saying we are not playing anymore. Our whole state would go crazy. The governor would get involved in that.”

You get a trophy … you get a trophy … and you get a trophy

His opinion of the traditions in the Big Ten is, well, what you would expect:

“I don’t know that you can have a trophy for every game.  Up in the Big Ten they have a bunch of them, several of them. If they want to do it, that’s fine.”

Little Ten

More recently, he dropped another jab at the Big Ten:

“Playing East Carolina is a lot tougher game than maybe picking up one of those bottom Big Ten teams, and a lot of fans around here would rather see a team that’s close by.”

Little Brother

After South Carolina’s Capital One Bowl victory over Wisconsin, Spurrier kicked off talking season by taking a jab at that other team in the state:

Cock of the walk

On other players committing to SC:

“It’s been sort of neat watching all these players commit to us when they could go to Florida, Georgia, Tennessee, even Ohio State up in there.”

All eyez on me

Just another day making fun of Clemson’s closed practices [fast forward to 4 minute mark].

What’s in a name

Instead of calling this ESPN broadcaster by his real name (Dari Nowkhah), the OBC calls him “Darcy.”

Dedication

Sometimes you need context provided during one of his talks. But perhaps it’s better that there is none.

Spurrier is not impressed

On Clemson’s Sammy Watkins prior to going in the first round of the NFL Draft:

If you ain’t first you’re last

He declared the Gamecocks the national champs of the 2013 bowl season.

“There’s going to be about 11 of us who are somewhere around 11-2 or 12-2, so we’ll see how it all shakes out. But I’m going ahead and declaring us the national champion of the bowl season.”

The fastest get paid, and the fastest get laid

On former SC player Jadeveon Clowney’s 110 mph speeding ticket in a 70 mph zone back in December:

Good Ol’ Rocky Top

And to close it out, here is Spurrier going hard at his favorite punching bag.