Steve Spurrier should have a camera and microphone following him around 24/7, because nearly every time he opens his mouth, it’s worth recording and playing back a dozen times.
Over the span of his career, Spurrier has spouted off tons of memorable quotes, but this offseason in particular has been a doozy for the Ol’ Ball Coach.
Here are the best Spurrierisms from the last few months to get you pumped for the season that’s just a couple weeks away…
He owns SEC Media Days. Once again, NO ONE had a more enjoyable presser than Spurrier.
“I find it interesting that they quit playing Texas. They played Texas 115 years like we have played Clemson and then they left that Big 12 conference and both schools got mad at each other and said, ‘We aren’t going to play you anymore.’ It would be like us and Clemson saying we are not playing anymore. Our whole state would go crazy. The governor would get involved in that.”
You get a trophy … you get a trophy … and you get a trophy
His opinion of the traditions in the Big Ten is, well, what you would expect:
“I don’t know that you can have a trophy for every game. Up in the Big Ten they have a bunch of them, several of them. If they want to do it, that’s fine.”
More recently, he dropped another jab at the Big Ten:
“Playing East Carolina is a lot tougher game than maybe picking up one of those bottom Big Ten teams, and a lot of fans around here would rather see a team that’s close by.”
After South Carolina’s Capital One Bowl victory over Wisconsin, Spurrier kicked off talking season by taking a jab at that other team in the state:
Cock of the walk
“It’s been sort of neat watching all these players commit to us when they could go to Florida, Georgia, Tennessee, even Ohio State up in there.”
All eyez on me
Just another day making fun of Clemson’s closed practices [fast forward to 4 minute mark].
What’s in a name
Instead of calling this ESPN broadcaster by his real name (Dari Nowkhah), the OBC calls him “Darcy.”
Sometimes you need context provided during one of his talks. But perhaps it’s better that there is none.
Spurrier is not impressed
On Clemson’s Sammy Watkins prior to going in the first round of the NFL Draft:
Spurrier on Bruce Ellington, mentions 3 TDs against Clemson: “I think that’s three more than their first-round pick.” Some guy named Sammy. — Ryan Wood (@ByRyanWood) January 18, 2014
If you ain’t first you’re last
He declared the Gamecocks the national champs of the 2013 bowl season.
“There’s going to be about 11 of us who are somewhere around 11-2 or 12-2, so we’ll see how it all shakes out. But I’m going ahead and declaring us the national champion of the bowl season.”
The fastest get paid, and the fastest get laid
On former SC player Jadeveon Clowney’s 110 mph speeding ticket in a 70 mph zone back in December:
Spurrier to Bianchi: “I didn’t know Jadeveon’s car that could go that fast. He doesn’t have a pretty car like those FSU guys used to drive.” — Heath Cline (@heathradio) December 12, 2013
Good Ol’ Rocky Top
And to close it out, here is Spurrier going hard at his favorite punching bag.
Steve Spurrier on SEC permanent rivals: “Alabama and Tennessee like each other. I don’t know why Tennessee would keep liking them though.” — Josh Kendall (@JoshatTheState) April 24, 2014