Cam Newton Packs Gatorade Purchase In New Commercial

Dear Gatorade consumers that want to grab a refreshing and rehydrating bottle:

If you don’t sweat it, you’re not allowed to get it. And if you do try, Cam Newton will be there waiting to pack the crap out of your purchase.

To tell you the truth, I’m a little confused about Gatorade’s tactics here. Does the drink company not want any inactive people purchasing their product, because I’d be willing to bet that’s a significant revenue stream.

[Possibly hungover editor sipping on a Gatorade nods head in agreement]