Bronsoning: The newest craze to hit the sports world


What do you call it when you stick your finger in your friends drink? It’s called Bronsoning.

A few years ago a friend of mine’s sister who lived in Cincinnati came to visit Chicago. While we were throwing a few back she told us this story about how over the past weekend in the Nati’ she had gone out on some guys boat that she met at the bar. She didn’t know who the guy was but said that she and her friends had a good time. Said the guy’s name was Bronson something.

Don’t know about you but there’s only one Bronson who lives in Cincinnati that I know of. We quickly describe Bronson Arroyo to her and low and behold that’s the guy. That’s right, my friend’s sister was on a boat with Bronson Arroyo and had no clue. To a bunch of sports junkies like ourselves this story was absolute gold.

Naturally we wouldn’t let this go and decided to take this up a few levels. We concluded that because Bronson is a professional athlete and can pick up chicks at will that he can pretty much do whatever he wants, especially if it’s on his boat. Because he’s picked up so many chicks, going to pound town all the time no longer gives him the fix that he’s looking for. That’s why he now sticks his finger in people’s drinks. Because he can.

And thus the Bronson was born.

From that moment we decided that we would now randomly stick our index finger in each others drinks and yell out “Bronson”. As this game evolved we started to say “you’ve been Bronsoned” and then shortened it to “Bronsoned”.

This is a great game to play when other people are drinking draft beer as they are wide open for an attack. It’s even better when they have no clue why you just Bronsoned them. When that happens enlighten them on what Bronsoning is, why we do it, and I’m pretty sure they’ll spread the word. Guys are stupid so doing something as trivial as sticking our finger in our friends drink all in the name of a Cincinnati Reds pitcher is definitely something thats right down our alley.