Official Gamedayr Kentucky Derby Drinking Game

A patron holds a mint julep before the 2013 Kentucky Oaks at Churchill Downs. (Jerry Lai-USA TODAY Sports)

A patron holds a mint julep before the 2013 Kentucky Oaks at Churchill Downs. (Jerry Lai-USA TODAY Sports)

Alrighty folks, it’s time for some cuatro de Mayo fun. Here’s the official Gamedayr drinking game for today’s Kentucky Derby. Grab a mint julep (if you’re a grandstander) or some Busch in a can (if you’re an infielder), and your favorite Kentucky Bourbon (I like Bulleit). As always: please drink responsibly. Have plenty of water handy and get some Gatorade for electrolytes. Make yourself a hot brown and throw some burritos in the microwave. Remember: tomorrow is Cinco de Mayo, so we’re gonna have to roll out of bed and do this all over again. Have fun.

This is for the Derby race only. I’d say start watching 90 minutes before post (or more if you’re going HAM). And away we go.


“Churchill Downs” is said
“Triple Crown” is said
“Mudder” is said
Every time a new horse takes the lead in the race (go by the graphic, not announcer)
Each time there is a shot of Louisville or surrounding areas
Each time Bob Baffert or Wayne Lucas is on TV


Whenever Louisville Cardinals are mentioned
Each time betting odds change
Whenever someone cries
If someone being interviewed says something in Spanish
For every spouse/child of an owner/trainer
Each time a celebrity is shown in the crowd


Each time a horse fights being put in the box (can be multiple times per horse)
If a person is holding a rolled up program
Whenever Kentucky Wildcats are mentioned
If a swear word makes it on TV
If winning horse bites the interviewer’s horse
Each time somebody thanks God


Man in seersucker suit
Man in full-brimmed hat (+1 bonus if it’s a straw hat)
Man wearing bowtie
Woman’s hat with feathers
Woman’s hat with glitter
Woman’s hat with architectural design
Woman’s hat with horse on it (+1 bonus for every horse)
Woman’s hat that is all red


Secretariat (1 drink)
Seattle Slew (2 drinks)
Affirmed (3 drinks)
Alydar (3 drinks)
Seabiscuit (4 drinks)
Rick Pitino (5 drinks)
John Calipari (10 drinks)
Adolph Rupp (finish your beer)
Colonel Sanders (take a shot)
Hunter S. Thonpson (Pick your poison)
Tim Tebow (funnel a beer while Tebowing)


One shot for every horse scratched before post—group chooses when to shoot
NBC shows a picture of Pitino’s new tattoo


During “My Old Kentucky Home”
During the bugle call


When Eight Belles is mentioned—RIP
At the obligatory Frac Daddy/Mac Daddy/Kris Kross reference—RIP Chris Kelley


Add up the post numbers of Win, Place, and Show. Drink this amount—i.e. if #8, #4, and #1 medal, then you drink 13. Get it? Yeah, you got this.


If have what it takes, waterfall for the entire race. Taking the challenge exempts you from any drinks that may take place during the race. No spilling, puking, or cheating—this is a game of honor!—or you get a sharpie mustache.


Put all the race numbers in a hat. Pass around the group until all numbers have been selected. Winner chooses punishment for everyone else—I recommend streaking, kendo sticks, or antiquing.

**For an added twist, play with Asshole rules: 1st=President, 2nd=VP, 3rd=Treasurer, everyone else=Asshole.**

Have fun everyone. Feel free to take or leave as many rules as you like—it gets tougher to remember as the event goes on, and with too many rules. I was left wanting more from the NFL Draft, so I decided to expand the list. Remember: drink responsibly and hydrate. Tomorrow is another challenge. Cheers.

2013 Kentucky Derby: Welcome to the Mainstream, Horse Racing