On Wednesday, a member fell from the college football coaching ranks when Carl Pelini announced his resignation from Florida Atlantic, effective immediately.
FAU is by no means a premier destination, but it is still an FBS program. The Owls moved up from the Sun Belt to Conference USA prior to this season. The school rests in the recruiting hotbed that is South Florida, no more than a few minutes from the beach.
That got us thinking. What would be the one person absolutely perfect for this gig? He would need the right mix of self-loathing and self-loving to take this type of job on.
There was only one that came to mind, and that is former USC Trojans coach Lane Kiffin. You remember him, right?
Here’s 10 reasons why Kiffin and FAU would be a match made in heaven:
10. Boca Raton is essentially LA-east. It has beautiful beaches and more money than you can shake a stick at.
9. FAU’s fans have absolutely zero expectations of winning. Neither does Kiffin.
8. California (Oakland, USC) has not been good to him. It’s time for the Kiffster to massage his ego a little bit in a new location.
7. His wife, Layla, is a Florida alumna. The two could pop up to Gainesville whenever they need a little Orange and Blue in their lives.
6. South Florida is a perfect area for his dad to retire, meaning Lane’s kids could be close to their grandfather.
5. He can’t do any worse than the lesser-known Pelini brother did, right?
4. Baco Raton is commonly referred to as the rat’s mouth, which suits the Kiffster perfectly.
3. The South Florida heat can easily over-inflate footballs. Kiffin could scratch his itch of deflating balls without receiving criticism.
2. In all seriousness, Kiffin could recruit lights out in South Florida.
This fan is just here to help put the two sides together:
Here’s Lane Kiffin’s phone number, FAU. 1-800-LOL-FTBL
— Brice Johnson (@Brice_Johnson) October 30, 2013