Welcome to Gamedayr’s Midweek Mailbag. We like to consider it a nice way to break the monotony of the week at hand, but for some reason it fills up with all of the crap you give us. Send all of your ridiculously absurd questions to email@example.com. Bring the heat, people! We’re used to being roasted by now.
Let’s get it rolling. Hump Daaaaay!
Q: What kind of dumbass do you have doing your gambling picks?!?! I could do better by flipping a coin. – Mark in Calabasas
A: Okay, jumping right into it, huh. Look, man, I’m no gambling Mensch.
Unsolicited Gambling Tip #1: if you choose games based on Internet pick ‘em columns, then you’re bookie is going to own you (literally and figuratively).
Unsolicited Gambling Tip#2: Betting off of Paul’s Picks gives you better odds than flipping a coin.
Unsolicited Grammar Tip: Ease up on the punctuation. We get the point.
Q: The Boot is the #1 college bar in the country. A One, A Two, A Helluva Hullabaloo. Go Wave! LSUcks! –Kari in NOLA
A: Not really a question, but we’ll take it. Love the pluck, Kari, but you’re wrong. That list of best college bars was just plain terrible. The Boot isn’t even the best bar in its area code. Check out Bruno’s, The Bulldog, or my personal favorite Cooter Browns. I have to believe that The Boot is only on the list because Friar Tuck’s no longer exists uptown.
New Orleans is a GREAT party town; we all know this. Tulane, though, not so much as a party school. I have a tough time giving the moniker of Best College Bar to any bar not associated with a Top 25 party school. Sorry, but you stole this one.
Q: What did you think about Johnny Football’s antics against Rice? – Geoff in Houston
A: I can’t lie; I love Johnny Manziel. You see, I’m a huge wrestling fan, so anytime we get an athlete that acts like a wrestling heel (villain) I’m all-in.
Deon was a ham and people loved it. Same with Ray Lewis. Same with Dikembe, T.O., Ochocinco, Gilbert Arenas, Yasiel Puig, and countless others. We need the bad guys. For one, they make games more interesting. Secondly, they make rooting for the good guys much sweeter. It’s fun watching villains get their comeuppance.
That’s what makes Manziel so engaging. He’s the biggest villain in the bully of all conferences. When Texas A&M beat Alabama last year it was David conquering Goliath. This year it’s the top two storylines in college football facing off. Neither school is sympathetic, nor are they particularly likeable. In two Saturdays one villain will be put down. Manziel’s actions up to that point only increase buildup for the year’s most intriguing game.
Q: Is Bologna and cheese the most underrated sandwich? You always have it as a kid, but never see it when you grow up. Most delis don’t offer it and you always get made fun of when making one at home. You know I’m right. – Franklin in Destin
A: Bologna (or baloney, or boloney, or however you spell it) sucks. Hate to break it to you, Franklin.
You want underrated? Go make a toasted peanut butter and bacon sandwich and call me in the morning. Best sandwich out there. Bible.
Q: You can go pro in any sport. The only tradeoff is that you’ll throw like a girl forever. Do you make that deal? If so, what sport? – Stephen in Atlanta
A: That’s a toughy, Stephen. Sounds like a deal that Carl Lewis made.
As far as sports go, baseball is obviously out of the picture (unless you want to be a badass DH). I’d have to go with either basketball or surfing. Basketball has the best athletes in the world. Surfers travel to the coolest places on earth. Either would be great.
But, I’ve gotta say no. I wouldn’t make the deal. Teaching your kid how to throw a ball is a right of passage for every father. I can’t imagine not having a catch with my kid. It’s what makes Field of Dreams great, for Pete’s sake. Plus, how embarrassing would it be for the child of a professional athlete not to know how to properly throw. That’s a worse blow to the ego than not knowing how to throw myself. I’m content with my limited abilities. If nothing else, at least I can throw better than John Wall.