New York Yankees have literally sued for the right to call themselves ‘The Evil Empire’

New York Yankees general manager Brian Cashman during batting practice before the game against the Boston Red Sox at Yankee Stadium. (John Munson/The Star-Ledger via USA TODAY Sports)

The New York Yankees seemingly do whatever they want each and every offseason. Oh, bring in Red Sox legend Johnny Damon (and make him shave and cut his hair)? Done, and then they win a World Series while they’re at it.

While the entire league scrimps and saves and tries to build from within their farm system, the Yankees have simply waited until small-town teams’ best players hit free agency and then signed them to unbelievable, astronomical contracts. Of course, New York Yankees fans love it — they stick out their tongues and point, laugh, and go with an old standby phrase like, “We just win” or “This is a free country”.

Darth Vader did not want a free society, however, and neither did late Yankees owner George Steinbrenner. No, The Boss wanted the world to revolve around his team and his dollar signs.

Just like Vader wanted the galaxy to run through his Death Star.

Thus, fans from Boston to Seattle and everywhere in between have decried the Yankees as not only bad for the game of ball, but straight up as “The Evil Empire”.

And you want to know the best part?

The Yankees agree — they have admitted to being exactly that, and have even sued Evil Enterprises Inc., owners of a website with the URL baseballsevilempire.com. The company recently filed to trademark the term “Baseball’s Evil Empire”.

But there were the damn Yankees, looking to own anything and everything in their path, and that includes this title along with those championship banners.

This according to the Wall Street Journal:

Evil Enterprises initially applied for a trademark back in July of 2008.

But the Yankees objected, arguing that they had the rights to the phrase-at least when used in connection with baseball.

Part of the Yankees’ argument: a concession that in the baseball world, they are, in fact, the “Evil Empire.” In its legal papers, the team referenced a number of articles from the past decade using the term in connection with the Yankees, and conceded that the team has “implicitly embraced” the “Evil Empire” theme by playing music from Star Wars during their home games.

The panel of judges sided with the Yankees, ruling that the Yankees are strongly associated with the phrase. Allowing anyone else to use the phrase exclusively would likely cause confusion, ruled the judges.

“In short, the record shows that there is only one Evil Empire in baseball and it is the New York Yankees,” wrote the judges. “Accordingly, we find that [the Yankees] have a protectable trademark right in the term . . . as used in connection with baseball.”

Congratulations, Yankees.

Sign all the guys you want, but at the end of the day, your fans have to look themselves in the mirror and admit that their own team declared themselves purely “Evil”.

Which must be music to Red Sox fans’ ears.

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